Midnight Blue, Snow white, Pitch Black, Blood Red
by EverydayClumsy
Summary: He wasn't like everybody else. He knew it even before he could grasp the concept of difference. He knew, he always knew because he felt. [Soul mate AU]


Everyone had a soul mate; it was luck if you found yours.

There was normally no special bound between them only the image on your right inner wrist. Only after you found your soul mate and shared a kiss of fate, a band that would keep you together for life, you would feel the connection. The bonded ones always covered their mark; they would understand the intimacy of this mark.

It shouldn't be like this.

He shouldn't be able to feel the pain of his soul mate. He shouldn't, but he did.

* * *

He wasn't like everybody else. He knew it even before he could grasp the concept of difference. He knew, he always knew because he _felt_.

He felt when his mother died. He knew when she gave her life away to bring him his. He felt that his father resented him but tried to love him. He felt everything.

He felt the pain his soul mate was carrying, from the first day of his life. He felt it like his own. Those blood bound to him, he knew, and his soul mate bound by fate, he felt what they felt and he knew. He knew when they were in pain or when they were sad, when they were happy, but those moments were rear.

He could feel, what they felt, when he looked into someone's eyes.

* * *

He could feel it before his father slammed him into the wall, he knew this would happen but he didn't dodge.

He felt his head split open and the thick blood gush out and he could feel loosing consciousness. But he still could feel the bullet enter his father's head. How it entered and left his skull, breaking the bone with ease. He could feel himself die for the second time. The last of his blood connections disappeared and he felt the loss.

He walked through life after that covering his mark. Avoiding eyes as best as he could. He saw too much, felt too much. He died enough for a life time and the constant sadness of his soul mate weighed him down, like an ever present shadow.

* * *

You didn't have to love you soul mate, you could be friends and share a different kind of love. Soul mates and the mark were things that the society long ago gave up and only saw with a minimum of curiosity. But he knew he loved his soul mate.

He knew when his soul mate was stressed and he wanted to hug him, to convey that everything will be better; he could feel the endless sadness. He knew he lost someone dear and he wanted to say to him he would never leave. But he knew he couldn't convey these feelings and thoughts.

There was a moment in his childhood were he felt a surge of power and he knew. He knew. He vomited for half an hour that time. It got better with the time. He couldn't bring up the hate he should have felt. That day he cried, he was a child, there wasn't much more he could do. As he got older he got used to it. He couldn't change it, he loved him.

* * *

A ring of midnight blue raven feathers and snow white stag antlers, in the middle a tree, their three, pitch black bark and blood red leaves. It was always a ring and a tree and this was theirs.

* * *

He swore to himself that he had already died enough for a life time but his fate had other plans. He had tried to save others from pain; he could do it for a while until he died.

He died for a minute, but this time it was his by the hand of those whom he tried to save.

With that he stopped saving people instead he trained other to save lives, leaving the police and teaching at the FBI.

As it was, he didn't have long before he was forced to save lives again. He didn't want to but he was now often in the field. Maybe it was sick mind bringing him here again and again, maybe it were his masochistic tendencies, but he came and saw.

He saw and died every time over and over.

* * *

It snowed the day they met.

* * *

He couldn't quiet believe that this was his soul mate. He never had a picture in mind but he this was definitely different to anything he could have imagined. Collected and perfect, but he knew all the sadness, hurt and anger behind the carefully manufactured façade. A monster that lurked behind it. It was the second time he fell in love with him, his maroon eyes and his sharp features.

He felt happy, for a moment.

There was resentment and hate all aimed at him and it hurt. But it was a new kind of hurt. Pain was nothing new to him but this pain was different. It pierced his flesh like icy daggers.

He knew that his soul mate didn't recognize him. That he felt nothing like what he felt himself and that he didn't love him.

"Ah there you are. This is Doctor Lecter. He will be helping with the ongoing case." Jack said as he stepped into the room.

"Doctor Hannibal Lecter." His soul mate stretched out a hand and smiled. A fake smile for civil purposes, nothing real behind it.

"Will Graham" he answered by taking his hand into a firm shake.

He could feel flowers on his mark, then it was his now with love that wouldn't be returned, blossom and die in the same breath. The leaves falling and rotting into his blood. It was the fourth time he died, but this time he died with a sincere smile on his lips, meeting eyes that hadn't smiled in a long time, wishing he could make them light up.

And in the moment he dies he feels who his soul mate is. He knows and feels. And he should be terrified but he isn't. He knew all along, it's only that he can now step away and see the whole picture.

He loves.

* * *

In the moment he sees Uncle Jacks pet, he feels disgust rise up. He sees a man tormented by life. Scrubby beard, gaunt body and lifeless eyes. He thinks of ways he can further destroy this thing, too broken to be even called an animal.

He doesn't want to be, he has to be civilized, so he shakes his hand.

The warmth is pleasant on his hand but he ignores it, put it into reaction to human contact.

He feels hatred for this weakling. He himself knows suffering and won't tolerate it when someone can't outlive and defeated it.

He looks into his eyes but they seem fading and loosing. He thinks, when he kills this creature he would free it.

'_Salvation for the sufferer_.' He thinks.

He sees when he rubs against his mark, covered under a black band and he's a little surprised, he wouldn't have guessed someone like him has somebody, he doesn't think it's covered out of decency.

He thinks of his own mark, but then he is different, he thinks it's rude, like running around naked.

* * *

The next time he sees him is the next day, Uncle Jack wants an evaluation on his pet and he thinks of ways he could kill this little pet of his. It's a nice pastime.

"Good morning." He is greeted with a smile and he returns it with one of his own fake ones.

"Good morning, William." He says "Can I come in?" he asks really not wanting to. To his surprise the house is much cleaner as it appears from the outside.

"Yes of course." Will answers and steps aside and lets him in.

He's greeted by pack of dogs but they don't approach him just watch and observe. He can see Will look at them and they leave the room.

"That's quite a lot of dogs." He comments, watching the younger man.

He just smiles and offers him a coffee.

"What brings you here?" he asks setting a cup in front of him. He regards the cup with a slight grimace. He wasn't asked after his preference. Rude.

"Agent Crawford sends me, I shall collect you and bring you to a new crime scene." He takes his cup and is surprised when it's to his taste.

"I'm so sorry you had to drive out this far to get me. Jack can be…" he trails off.

"It's quiet all right." He says "He said it's something new from the Riper." He has to hide a grimace behind his cup.

He sees the other man frown. "That couldn't be." He says and shuts his mouth looking flustered as if he just realized what he said.

He raises an eyebrow at the younger man and takes another sip of his coffee.

He then sees him smile.

He's curious and he wants to ask how he knows it's not the ripper instead other words tumble out unasked. "If I may ask why do you cover your mark?" he smiles pleasantly but bites his tongue.

And the other man chuckles and he frowns at that, he doesn't want to think that his action was noticed.

"Your mark is also covered." He says with a smile. "But to answer your question, isn't it rather rude showing everyone what is only meant to be seen by two?" he says and smiles but with sadness and touches his covered mark.

He watches the motion and feels himself mirroring it. He feels the need to see the mark of the other but before he can say a thing, he can feel a dog by his leg. He looks down at him and he nudges his right hand.

Will sees that and laughs. Hannibal can feel a chill run down his spine. He feels like he missed the sound his whole life without knowing it.

"Winston, stop!" Will says and the dog looks at him with big eyes.

And he stands now in front of him and knees down in front of the dog "Sorry." He says and there is so much sadness in his voice.

He feels guilt bubble up in his gut but he doesn't know why. He frowns looking at the scene. He brushes his hand over the dogs head. Will smiles at him lightly.

As he stands up and turns away he catches him by his right wrist. He pulls him back.

He narrows his eyes and he feels strange. He wants to tear away the black band around Will's wrist and see the mark. He wants to know what it looks like. He wants to look at his own but he doesn't understand why.

He thinks about killing him with the knife on the counter, he thinks about gutting him here and now, but then there is it again. Guilt. And he doesn't understand.

Will doesn't resist when he grips his wrist hard enough for his fingers to leave marks. He just looks into his eyes.

"Who are you?" He asks still holding him close.

He feels him take a deep breath and he feels it ghost across his skin.

Will places a hand on his hand where he is holding him and he knows even if he lets him go he won't back away. So he lets go.

He raises his hand and slowly unwraps the black band around his wrist, never loosing the eye contact.

When he is done it drops on the floor and he takes his wrist and unwraps his band and lets it meet the ground.

He stretches his arm out and holds it next to his

He sees the marks and his breath catches in this throat.

They are the same, but different, he grimaces. He brushes over Will's mark with his thumb and can feel it under it. There are no leaves on his tree, only black braches.

He looks up and he sees a soft smile on his lips and he sees that he wants to say something but won't so he speaks instead. Holding his hand, letting its warmth seep into his fingers.

"You knew?" he wants for it to sound like a statement but it comes out as a question.

"Yes." He answers in a hushed but surprisingly strong voice.

"What else do you know?" He asks, not quite sure if he wants an answer. There are things which, if he knows them, will bring him as his death angel over him.

And he doesn't want that to happen anymore and he is scared because he never felt like this before and he stares at their hands. He tries to understand from where this is coming because just yesterday there was none of this only the opposite.

"Everything." Will answers after a moment and he grimaces, he has to kill him. But instead he just leans forward and warps his hand around the side of his neck. He pulls him close and touches their foreheads together.

There is the scent of flowers in the air and the smell of fresh earth in a summer rain. It's in the middle of the winter but he can smell it. He presses their lips together and he knows in that moment that this is his kiss of fate.

He knows and understands.

He knows Will's whole life and knows Will knows his. He knows that Will felt everything already before they met and he knows that he s reliving everything he did again. His pain, anger, sadness, his everything. And he knows every time Will died and what he puts himself through. He knows what it felt like for him the day he first killed. And he knows of yesterday, when he died once again but this time it was his fault.

And he understands that he only knows but William feels.

It only lasts a few seconds but it feels like a lifetime. Hannibal knows that he only got a glimpse of the pain Will endured.

He cries.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry…" He repeats it like a mantra. Will pulls him into a warm and tight hug.

"Shh…, shh…, it's okay. Everything is okay." He murmurs into his hair. "It is alright." He kisses is his temple.

They stay like this until Hannibal calms down.

He looks at him and he wipes away the wetness from his cheeks, he smiles at him. And Hannibal says "You love me." He halts Will's hand with his, where it is pressed against his cheek "You still love me." He breathes out unbelieving.

"Yes, of course I do." He answers taking the hand that is holding his and bringing it to his lips, pressing kisses to his knuckles.

His right wrist feels warm; he rises it and looks at it. White flowers bloom between red leaves and Will brings his wrist next to his and red leaves spring and white flowers bloom.

He laughs; he feels warmth spread through his body. Their marks are now the same, he is happy. Happier than he has ever been and he knows why.

He kisses Will again and pulls him close.

"I love you." He whispers and kisses him again. He whispers it over and over again between kisses and drinks away the tears falling from his eyes.

He doesn't need to say a word, their connection doesn't need any more words. They understand without them and Hannibal knows that Will is his and he knows he is Will's. He knows that Will will be loyal until death and even further, because he has always been and he wishes to do the same.

They stand there in the middle of the kitchens with the dogs now lying next to them kissing in a warm embrace.

Their piece of heaven and understanding is disturbed by Wills ringing phone. And he is tempted to smash it and he knows Will feels the same. But they are civilized men and don't do that. Instead they separate only far enough for Will to pick it up. He presses his forehead to Hannibal's shoulder when he has his phone and his arm pulls him close.

After such a long time of being alone he wants to savor this closeness. He hears Jack yelling though the phone and he wants too yell back.

He wants to protect what is rightful his.

He doesn't, he only pulls Will closer. He listens as he apologizes and says they are on their way.

He sighs deep and lets him go.

He thinks about what this means for him, for them, because now he couldn't imagine a life where Will isn't there. Will picks up their bands and wants to warp their marks but Hannibal stops him and takes the white band he's been wearing, he's been wearing it for a long time. It feels like part of himself and he takes Will's hand.

He speaks as he warps the thin material around the slim wrist in his hand.

"This is new, at least for me, I know you have known me for as long as you lived and I'm sorry." He more feels than sees that Will is about to protest so he cuts in "No, I'm sorry. There are things you shouldn't have…" He breaks of thinking about the agony he left with Will after his first kill, he was only a small child.

There is a warm hand on his cheek "I told you, it's alright." The words are warm and true and he smiles and continues.

"I don't want to miss this for nothing." He waves a hand between them and Hannibal continues to hide away Will's mark. It is only his to see.

"I don't know the best solution for this but the best I can come up with is only one thing." He says and he finishes warping Will's wrist.

"Will you marry me?" He asks and strokes Will's cheek, he knows he will say yes but he still feels nervous and a little scared. His smile is radiant and makes Hannibal smile too.

William takes Hannibal's hand and starts warping his band around Hannibal's wrist.

"I forgave you a long time ago." He says and Hannibal breathes out. He knew it already but hearing it out loud makes it more real.

"And I also don't want to miss this. I missed you all my life. I don't want to lose you now that I found you." He says as he warps the last part.

"And of course I will marry you." He says securing the band.

Hannibal grins and pulls him into a passionate kiss. He knows they have to break apart soon but he doesn't want to. He doesn't want to share this moment and this day with anyone but he knows better, so he lets go.

* * *

When they get to the crime scene, no one sees a difference between the two men who are, in the eyes of the others, nothing more than strangers. And they won't, they both know this is not the place to show the newfound affection.

Jack looks at him skeptically but Hannibal knows that's because he wants the psychological evaluation.

What Jack gets instead the next day is Will's resignation letter.

He is practically fuming when he arrives at Wills home the next week, when he realizes that Will meant really to quit his job. He screams and threatens that he won't be able to teach anymore and Will stops him there and explains that he has no wish to teach or do fieldwork ever again or in that matter see a dead body ever again and he smiles.

Jack stops for the first time since his arrival and looks at Will. He hasn't seen the man in a week. And he looks healthy, that surprises him. There are no dark shadows under his eyes and he isn't as pale as death anymore. He feels a pang of guilt. He then notices the cartons in the living room. He crinkles his eyebrows.

"You moving?" He asks as he calms down.

"Yes, not too far, but yeah. I'm selling the house and moving elsewhere." He answers petting the dog standing next to him.

As he watches the action he notices that the band around his wrist is different and there is a ring on his finger. He raises his eyebrows but can't find the words to ask what he actually wants to ask. Instead he asks again if he will return and when he is met with a negative answer he says goodbye and leaves.

A month later he gets an invitation to a bookshop opening 'Morpheus'.

He can't bring himself to go, he would never admit it but he feels betrayed.

His team goes and he hears that Will looks good, that he is saner that they had ever seen him and he's happy. They say he's engaged.

Two month after the bookshop opening he gets another letter.

It's for him and his wife and she sees it first, she's delighted and they have to go.

* * *

It's the only day they both decided that they won't cover their marks. It's their day and they want the world to see that they belong together.

"I would never have thought you would end up married one day." Beverly teases him lightly before the ceremony.

He smiles "Really?" He laughs a little "Well there wasn't actually any other possibility after I met him." He grins.

And it takes a moment for her to understand. She looks at his wrist and searches out Hannibal as she peaks through the door. She looks at him with a bright smile and hugs him tightly.

"Oh my God, congratulation!" She squeaks "That is so amazing!" She exclaims releasing him.

* * *

"I can't believe that he got married." Price says while nursing his drink. Zeller hums in agreement.

"Oh shut it you two, you are just jealous." Beverly scolds them both.

"Who knows if it will last?" Price adds bitterly.

Beverly only grins at him.

"What?" He asks.

"You didn't notice anything?" She asks challenging.

Both men narrow their eyes at her "No, why?" Price asks.

"Maybe you should look again!" She says and walks away laughing.

They observe the grooms and then they notice.

"Oh come on, that's not fair." Zeller shots down his drink and frowns.

"We _are_ jealous." Price says with a frown.

Zeller hums in agreement.

* * *

And there is a life full of happiness between them. They know it's a life that will end in the same time.

They lay next to each other and their fingers are intertwined. On the side there sits their daughter and son, with children of their own. And they are holding onto their soul mates and Will knows they are sad but they know the end is near. So he speaks.

_"Don't be sad it's-" _

_"only a new beginning."_

And it's the fifth time he dies. This time it's all his own, but he shares it. It's peaceful and he knows Hannibal will be there next to him. This time there is love on his lips and happiness all around him.

And on the grave where they lay with fingers intertwined, there grows a tree, bark as black as the deepest of the night with leaves of blood red. It won't break in the strongest of the storms or wilt in the worst of weathers.

And every summer it blooms with flowers so white, when wind passes by and plucks them, it's like the winter that day when they met.

* * *

A/N: First published on archiveofourown under the same pen name :).

As always not beta read, because I can't find a good beta who would put up with me, so if you find errors of any kind, please feel free to tell me :3.

I think i need to apologize for the writing style but I really think it works out in this story, i hope you liked it.


End file.
